TAMMY WRITES LIFE

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Does love break when trust is Broken

- July 28, 2022

Well it certainly doesn't strengthen it or deepen it! It will test it to its limits and pollute it. Most often it destroys it and kills it dead instantly or slowly over time in a painful toxic way. As when you love and trust the one person who is closest to you in life, and they betray you, its hard to see them as the same person you loved and thought you knew. And hard to forgive their betrayal because you know they don't value you … Plus it's hard to ever trust them again or anyone else! As you didn't think they would ever do it the first time..but they did!! It shocks you to the core and initially you trust noone.. as afterall they were the last person you thought would betray you! Without trust you can't be in a relationship with someone, no matter how much you love them. So often that love turns to hate and resentment in the end anyway because they did this and not you.. But if you do get through it which takes a strong love in the first place, and a bl

How do you know what to do about fidelity

- May 22, 2022

With Time! And by which I mean in your own time on your time frame! Firstly take your time to get your head around it all properly and don't do anything at all until you have got over the shock and processed it. You need to give yourself time for it to all sink in first before you can begin to think about the future.. Your well within your rights to ask whatever you want to know about it and to get as many explanations for it as you need to fully comprehend it all. It's the very least they can do after they have betrayed you and shook your entire life up. But if they can't deal with it and refuse to let you know all there is to know about it, don't do anything rash, out of sheer anger and despair but accept that it will just take you longer now to decide what to do about it… Once you have digested it all and got your head around it, you will be in a far better state of mind to know how to deal with it, with your own best interests at heart! As kneejerk reactions to sce

What do you do when the door shuts behind you?

- January 28, 2022

🙈🙉🙊 By far my worst experience of this was when I was in Sydney By far my worst experience of this was when I was in Sydney Australia staying with a friend who didn't like smoking in her home and even though she was not home and had gone to work, I respected her wishes and went outside to smoke. I was in my skimpy short pj's which were more scruffy than sexy, no shoes on my feet, hair unbrushed, and nothing in my hands except for my cigarettes and lighter.. Then the door closed behind me and I realised I had no key, no phone and no money! And on top of being in my pj's, shoeless, looking unkempt, void of keys, money and phone I came to the added reality of it being Australia in summer and likely to hit mid 30s and I had no water or sunscreen on and noone was coming back for at least the next 7 hours.. and I didn't actually know exactly where my friend worked or the name of the company she worked for but I knew that it was in finance for a company in Sydneys finan

Stop the World, I want to get off!

- January 15, 2022

Stop the world, I want to get off! https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B08L2H5HP7/ref=cm_sw_r_awdo_navT_g_H50C0D5B6M4Y32GNKXDB

Core moral values

- October 30, 2020

Core moral principles are essential to live life the right way and be true to yourself! I believe that we can and should all try to live by a set of core moral principles regardless of whether your opinion of religion is. Or that it is no longer relevant and out of touch with modern day living. A view shared by many in these modern times! This is sad, as in my opinion the key principles for all religions are the same and still relevant and fit for purpose as a guide for better living, if adapted and understood in todays terms. Our human instincts give us all a conscience to guide us to do the right thing and the sense of right and wrong, regardless of any religious faith. Not so long ago these basic human principles were taught to most via Christian and Catholic religion through schools prior to multi cultural Britain. Now so as not to offend other faiths, sadly no core morals are being taught or learned at school anymore (or anywhere) thus a whole new generation is missing o

Your thoughts will become your reality

- October 04, 2020

"NEWS FLASH" We are in control of our thoughts and we can change the way we perceive the world around us by changing our thought process and breaking negative thought cycles and dispelling limiting beliefs. We are able to change our experiences in life by focusing on what we want as our subconscious will automatically search for the things that manifest in our minds as its solution driven. I.e. if your mind is set on travelling to another country, you will start seeing everything associated with your dream in everything around you such as on a billboard or on TV or in a shop window as your mind will automatically draw your attention to these things which is also the case when we focus on negative things as the subconscious mind will look to reinforce them which is why when we are having a difficult time it seems that everything goes wrong... your mind is your reality so think smart!

10 things you should not expect from others

- August 10, 2020

* Stop expecting others to behave like you want them too or to understand why you behave as you do * Stop expecting others to take responsibility for your shit and or bail you out of your shit * Stop expecting others to think the same way as you do or assume that you know what they are thinking or they know what you are thinking. Be clear * Stop expecting others to make the decisions in life that you should be making and or blame them if you take their advice and it goes wrong * Stop expecting others to put your needs first and to do right by you and dont put the needs of others before your own * Stop blaming others for the things that are wrong in your life or use them as an excuse for not doing what you want in life * Dont expect others to always be in your life and don't promise to always be in their lives * Dont expect others to have, meet or respect the same standards that you have and don't judge others by your own standards * Stop expecting others to have your b

10 things to stop doing to be happy

- July 17, 2020

The 10 things I have stopped doing in my life... I have stopped listening to gossip and gossiping about others I have stopped worrying about what other people think of me I have stopped worrying about things that have not yet happened I have stopped dwelling in the past and torturing myself with the could have, should have, would have scenarios and accept that the past is gone and cant be changed. I have stopped asking others for their advice and opinions and rely upon myself and my own abilities to make the best decisions for me I have stopped apologising for being myself and have accepted that I am who I am I have stopped wallowing in self pity when things dont go my way I have stopped relying upon others to help me in the hard times and I can rely upon myself I have stopped doing anything that I dont want to do or need to do I have stopped caring about whether others like me or not as I like me and that's all that matters

Getting past hurt and pain

- June 28, 2020

The only way you can get over something that has caused you pain and hurt you is by processing it and coming to terms with it so you can move on whether you do this yourself or with the help of a professional. Sadly there is not a fast forward button to press in life that will take you past it all but you will move forward from it faster if you face it head on and deal with it. Many people make the mistake of trying to avoid dealing with it and think that if they put it out of their mind or distract themselves for long enough then it will go away but it wont and unless you resolve your feelings and emotions attached to it then it will never go away and will keep bubbling up inside you until it is resolved and this can cause detriment to your mental and physical wellbeing. You have already survived it and so to process it in a safe place in order to heal from it is not going to harm you and although you may feel uncomfortable at times to revisit it, you have to face it and process i

Stop with the self pity

- June 24, 2020

The only person who you can ever really rely upon in life is yourself and when you know that you have to rely upon yourself to get things done then you will realise that self pity, a victim mentality and a ‘why me' or ‘its not fair' attitude is not going to change your circumstances or make you feel better about things, in fact it will stop you from doing something to make your life better and will probably make you feel bitter and resentful and stuck in a rut. You have no control over the poor behaviour of others and you are not responsible for their poor behaviour and you are certainly not to blame for it so you have to look at it as shame on them and not shame on you and rise above it and take responsibility for yourself and your own life to move forward from it without letting it have a detrimental effect on you and your self worth or change the way that you treat people and yourself. You are responsible for the way you conduct yourself and no matter what happens you

Top tips for healthy self esteem

- June 23, 2020

Firstly you have to accept yourself as you are for good and bad as you are who you are and you should never apologise for that or try to change for others just to be accepted and fit in and you should certainly never dislike parts of yourself. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses and you have to learn to love them all in the same way as you are unique and there are reasons why you are the way you are. Pushing yourself out of your comfort zone to try new things is a good way to enhance your self esteem and confidence in yourself and your own abilities. Doing one small thing a day to help you grow, learn and develop means that in a year you will have accomplished at the very least 365 different things that will have changed you for the better and increased your self esteem and worth. Taking responsibility for your own actions, decisions and the consequences that they bring also will make you feel more confident in yourself as you will know that you

Dont stress it!

- June 08, 2020

How can you live a happy life without stress? You have to accept life on lifes terms and have faith in your own abilities to be able to deal with the challenges you have that are in your control by realising that life throws nothing at you that you are not fully equipped to deal with and not worry about the things that you have no control over. Everything passes in time and nothing ever stays the same so accept that all you have is the present moment and in that moment if you are not thinking about the past or projecting into the future then in the here and now you are ok so enjoy the present moment as all is well in this place at that very moment. There is always a positive and a negative in all circumstances that arise even if you initially see only the negatives so look for the positives and you will see them. You should not waste time stressing about events in the past as the past is gone and it cant be changed and you should not waste time s

You know who you are better than anyone

- May 01, 2020

As we go through life we must hear a million times or more from others that we are this person or that person or we should be this way or that way. From teachers, parents, friends and even those who barely know us, they all have an opinion to give about the person they think we are and the person they want us to be! Sadly its human nature to want to label others and to put everyone in a box or category but a wise human being like you is aware that you cannot be defined in one way as we are all very unique and complex individuals and we cannot be compared. However if you try to fight everyone who tries to define you as one thing or another or tell you what you should be you will become exhausted and you even may act out of character in the opposite extreme to make your point that they are not getting you which may come across as insincere and not a true reflection of who you are and likely to make them reinforce that they have the right opinion of you as they will

Let others take responsibility

- March 28, 2020

Responsibility is an important value to teach because no one can succeed in life if they are not responsible . ... Without responsibility , they will leave things undone and get in trouble. Many people believe that by taking responsibility and sorting out the issues on behalf of the people who they care about is their duty if they are in a position to do so and if they are able to sort out everything they can for this person without having to let it impact them or even cause a ripple in that person's life then they will have done right by them. 'Guilty'!!! Being the eldest of four siblings, this is something that I have done regularly over the years and I still find it hard to back off at times even to this day despite my siblings all being in their forties now! The need to take responsibility for others comes from a place of caring and wanting to make it easier for others so the motives for this are often sincere (if not a little controlling at t

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