TAMMY WRITES LIFE

Responsibility  is an important  value  to teach because no one can succeed in life if they are not  responsible . ... Without  responsibility , they will leave things undone and get in trouble. Many people believe that by taking responsibility and sorting out the issues on behalf of the people who they care about is their duty if they are in a position to do so and if they are able to sort out everything they can for this person without having to let it impact them or even cause a ripple in that person's life then they will have done right by them. 'Guilty'!!! Being the eldest of four siblings, this is something that I have done regularly over the years and I still find it hard to back off at times even to this day despite my siblings all being in their forties now! The need to take responsibility for others comes from a place of caring and wanting to make it easier for others so the motives for this are often sincere (if not a little cont...

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Self talk! Inner dialogue! Internal speech! Voice in your head! Inner monologue!  Whatever you choose to call it, we all have this voice going on inside our head every single second of our lives but despite this constant inner dialogue many of us are not really aware of it consciously or do we actually take the time to even listen properly to how we self talk!   We just accept what we are saying to ourselves and just go with it without ever considering to question it or to assess whether it is doing us more harm than good! Quite often than not we are our own worst enemies!  We have the self awareness on occasions to recognize that if we spend too much time with negative people then it has a negative effect on us and our mood and so we decide to distance ourselves from them but we rarely listen to what we are saying to ourselves!  Sadly most of us are our biggest critics and the ones who are the most unkind to us. You make a mis...

When you set personal boundaries these must be in areas that you have total conviction and believe in because they are important to you and at the very centre of your core values upon which you live your life. Therefore they need to be strong and apply to everyone who you allow into your life and things that you are not prepared to compromise on. For example if you value honesty then you will set a personal boundary that you will not accept being lied to by another and the consequences for them doing so is that you will cut them out of your life. To feel confident about setting personal boundaries you must ensure that these things really matter to you, know why they matter to you and be clear about what the consequences are should these boundaries be crossed. Lastly for you to set boundaries that you expect to be honoured then you will have to be able to respect and honour these things in your conduct with others as you cannot have double standards when it comes to...

I know it's an old cliche but you have to be able to love and trust yourself first. When you can do this then you will know that you will always be able to rely upon yourself to get through anything and you will take responsibility for your own life and happiness therefore you don't have to take any unnecessary risks to invest all your love and trust in another to make you happy. Being able to trust yourself and your ability to make the important decisions in life that are right for you will mean that you will not have any need to trust or rely upon others with the big things in life which will make it less scary because you will only be willing to and need to trust them with the little things initially that will not have a major impact on you should they prove to be untrustworthy as you will have managed damage limitation and know not to trust them again with no real harm done. Those that prove they are worthy of your trust and love you will be able to give further...

The first time I experienced the end of a relationship I thought that I would never get over it or would I ever survive from the pain of my broken heart.. I thought my world had ended and all anyone could say to me was you will get over it in time but I didn't believe them and it was of no help or comfort to me whatsoever as how could they possibly know that! However they were right and in time I did get over it.. Since then I have found myself in that very same situation time and time again but even in the knowledge that I did get over it once before when I really thought that I wouldn't, every time I have found myself in this situation again, I still have the same feelings of I will never get over it as this time it is different from before! However with time yet again I do get over it! So how do we get over it? The loss of a relationship is very similar to the grieving process in that we mourn for the loss of that relationship and all the hopes and dreams we onc...